Godzilla vs. Mothra

FLAP ME ANOTHER JACK

For the past two months, I’ve been obsessed with pancakes. One day at brunch I ordered them for reasons I can’t recall.* For the rest of that week I thought about how satisfying and gooily delicious they were. Now I’ve begun keeping a large bottle of maple syrup on hand in my pantry and have incorporated homemade pancakes into my weekend morning routine.

This new phenomena has resulted in two discoveries (neither of which are about myself):

1) Jack has to wash his hands immediately after eating pancakes because he feels sticky. I suggested that he stop molesting the pancakes, but he claims that he doesn’t. He says the maple syrup somehow ‘travels.’ Weird.

2) If you find that you’ve run out of milk while making pancakes, you can use a combination of vanilla ice cream and water instead. You can’t tell a difference. I swear.

*Note that I typically put more focus on the lunch side of brunch. Nothing says Sunday brunch like a patty melt! This is clearly related to my Alabama upbringing, which entailed bi-weekly visits to the multitudes of Waffle-King/House establishments that made up the restaurant scene in my town.

WHAT UP IN DA’ FLICKS, BIATCH?!!

I heard this conversation while riding the EL home from work on Friday. I was taking the purple line express downtown from Evanston and these two guys got on at the Howard stop:

(GUY 1 & GUY 2 enter the train and shuffle around for several seconds before settling into the seat next to me and the one across the aisle.)

GUY 1: Hey. (Pauses.) Hey, man. You seen benchwarmers?
GUY 2: Wha?
GUY 1: You seen benchwarmers?
GUY 2: (Grunts to indicate that he’s still confused.)
GUY 1: (Chuckling and shaking his head.) That shit is funny.
GUY 2: You talkin’ bout a flick or sumpin?
GUY 1: They play baseball and shi-yut. (Shakes his head some more and grins.) Funny shit, man.
GUY 2: I ain’t seen ‘at.

(GUY 1 & 2 stop talking and stare past each other in a reflective manner for several stops.)

GUY 1: (Off-handedly.) You seen wedding crashers?
GUY 2: Wha?
GUY 1: Wedding Crashers.
GUY 2: Da-yam!. (Nodding his head and chuckling.)
GUY 1: Funny shit.
GUY 2: Yeah.
GUY 1: Yeah.

(GUY 1 & 2 relax back against their seats again and are silent. I reach my stop.)
fin

On Monday, I added Benchwarmers to my netflix queue. I thought ‘Wedding Crashers’ was fantastic, so I’m hoping that I can extrapolate the fact that we share the same taste in one movie to us sharing the same taste in all movies.

I think these two guys would be great on their own show. The format would be set-up exactly like that of Ebert and Roeper, but instead of thumbs up or thumbs down, they could say it was either ‘whack’ (thumbs down) or ‘off-da-hook’ (thumbs up).** It could be on PBS, and they could call it ‘What Up in da’ Flicks, Biatch?!!’

I would watch it.

**Note that I’m flexible on this. I’m just brainstorming is all.

PUBLIC BROADCASTING

Speaking of PBS, I haven’t had cable for over three years now, and PBS has become a staple of my TV diet out of necessity. I’m going to be frank for a second and tell you that prior to not having cable, I thought PBS sucked. I inherited this opinion from my Father, and it was fortified by a childhood of having both cable and satellite TV simultaneously.***

***Ridiculous. I know.

Not having cable has opened my eyes to the joys of PBS. National Geographic, BBC Comedies, Jacque Cousteau specials, old movies I’d never even heard of like ‘Bringing Up Baby.’ I could go on and on.

Julia Childs. Jacques Pepin. Marathon specials of Mr. Bean. Sorry.

So anyway. One of my favorite PBS discoveries is that BBC show ‘Coupling.’ It’s awesome, and I purchased the full series on DVD off of Ebay today for thirty-two bucks. On Amazon it’s eighty. The vendor is in Korea, but he has an excellent ebay rating so I’ll let you know whether I’ve been hosed by this deal or not.

Speaking of Korea, for awhile I was picking up a Korean channel on my TV. During that time, I got really attached to this soap opera/mini-series called ‘Attic Cat’. Unfortunately, the channel went out before the series was finished so I’m not sure how it ended. Also on that channel was a TV show that depicted some bear and lion cubs living together in the same enclosure at what I’m assuming was a zoo. During the show, they would sometimes escape and trash the adjoining office (which I think belonged to the zookeepers?). They would knock the computers off of the desks causing them to shatter across the cement floor and tear documents apart while simultaneously cramming them into their mouths. There weren’t subtitles for this show, but it didn’t need them. It was the physical interaction between the bear and lion cubs that made it so compellingly awesome.

Kind of like watching Godzilla vs. Mothra, but when they were young and cute.

Why did you leave me Korean channel? Just tell me what you want, and I can change. I know I can make you happy. It’s just I get so jealous when you disappear like that with no explanation and I’m forced to sit around stewing in a tepid vat of rejection all day long like I don’t even matter. No! Wait! Don't go! I’m sorry, Korean Channel. Don’t walk away! I only say those things cause I love you so much …


Sorry, I’m feeling silly today.

- yEarning for Excellent Korean television